Lysistrata- Playbill


by Aristophanes

Staged in October 1995 AD, the classic Greek tale of sex, war and pettiness was given a modern twist, and songs were written to reggae, rap and rock. See pictures here.

Here is the playbill:

Grand Central Theatre is proud to present


A Comedy in two acts by Aristophanes

4 P.M., October 14th-15th, A.D. 1995

GCT, 150 Central Street

San Francisco, CA

About the Play

The time is 411 B.C. Seventy years ago, Athens successfully united Greece in a protective alliance against the invading Persian Empire. Athens then subjugated its allies, including Sparta and Thebes, and built its own power with the alliance's Treasury. Sparta revolted in 430 B.C., but 10 years of bloody war has thus far provided no victor. For this year's festival of Anthesteria, honoring Dionysus (God of revelry, ecstasy, and intoxication), Aristophanes has created Lysistrata as a voice for dissatisfaction with state and sexual politics. Ironically, women are not only forbidden from the stage, but are also banned from the audience. Sympathetic citizens will kindly not report our transgressions to the Board of Commisioners.


Director: Jennifer Welch

Assistant Director: Tony Brooke

Additional Direction: Jon Fast

Stage Manager: Aleksandras Tamulis

Stage Design: Shane Kitchen

Costume Design: Chris Ceci, Sita Rose

Original Score, Guitar: Richard Wheyland

Sound Editing, Production: Tony Brooke

Drums: Chris Linnevers

Mistress Of Props: Kathryn Altamore

Backdrop Artist: Deidre DeFranceaux

Historical Research: Dan Dion

The Cast

( In Order of Appearance )

Lysistrata: Stephanie Wright

Kleonike: Jennifer Welch

Myrrhine: Chris Ceci

Lampito: Chloe Lampito Taylor

Ismenia: Kathryn Altamore

Steatopygous Korinthian Woman: Shannon Kitchen

Dionysus as Himself

Lysistrata's Eunuch: Aleksandras Tamulis

Koryphaios of Men: Lorenz Marti

Swifty: Tony Brooke

Chipper: Stefan Marti

Kinesias: Matt Hitchcock

Athenian Slave: David Meader

Heidi: Heidi Van Eck

Stratyllis: Kirsten Wahlborg

Koryphaios of Women: Sita Rose

Athenian Drummer: Chris Linnevers

Commissioner of Public Safety: Jon Fast

First Policeman: Trung Lai

Second Policeman: Shane Kitchen

First Spartan Herald: Richard Wheyland

Second Spartan Herald: Stefan Marti

Peace: Kathryn Altamore

About the Players

Stephanie Wright earned accolades for her stunning job as understudy for Captain Kathryn Janeway on Star Trek: Plymouth Voyager. Scripts poured in like so many misty drops of rain. She vehemently denies the vicious rumours of birthing Patrick Stewart's 14 bald children.

Jennifer Welch just docked from her title role in a Princess Cruise Line production of The Last Days of the Titanic. In The San Francisco Chronicle Travel section, the Little Man was clapping as his boat tipped over.

Chris Ceci is proud to return to the Grand Central Theatre (GCT) after a horrendously tear-jerking production of Crimes of the Fried Green Magnolias, in which she portrayed a white, Southern, victim of love who was dying of lactose intolerance.

Chloe Lampito Taylor has acted at different amusement parks nationwide. She was recently cast in a San Francisco Municipal Pool Production of the musical Waterworld Live! She was a perfect choice for the role of Lampito since that's her real name. How about that!

Kathryn Altamore's dedication to the world of theatre adds a touch of class and respectability to this otherwise loathsome, boring, and trite production. The Grand Central Theatre is honored to have among it's cast a member of the Actor's Equity Association Hall of Fame.

Shannon Kitchen is whooping and hollering with joy over this opportunity to display her fine acting prowess. She thanks her brother Shane for giving her guidance on the casting couch.

Dionysus, also known as Bakkos, Pan, Eleuthereus, Minotaur, Sabazios, Inuus, Faunus, Priapus, Liber, Ammon, Osiris, Shiva, Zagreus, and The Lizard King (among others) is alive and well and living in San Francisco. He continues to preach liberation and to expose the oppressive fraudulance of Christianity.

Aleksandras Tamulis has most recently appeared on stage in the award-winning aN eVENING oF nEO-sURREALIST tHEATRE. He has worked on numerous other productions bringing cheese onto the stage. Aleks has a yet unfilled ambition to be crucified as part of some future theatrical production.

Lorenz Marti was discovered inside a remote hut by the director after a three-day vertical climb of 4000 meters up The Alps. She was flabbergasted by the lonesome, celibate man of thirty-seven years whose thuderous voice broke shingles off the neighboring hut's roof when he proclaimed, "Dammit! Who brewed this flavored coffee?!?" But could he sing? After a crash ESL course the next morning, the director exulted, "Praise be to the Gods!" and as they yodelled off into the sunset, the cast was complete.

Tony Brooke comes to us fresh from the smash Broadway hit A is for Antidisestablishmentarianism where he portrayed himself. Tony's previous embellishments include the title roles in Herve! and The Couch Who Came To Dinner, directing Oh, Calcutta!, and scoring Shane.

Sita Rose joined us last year in our critically acclaimed comedy Angry Housewives. She is also starring in Faster Pussycat, Kill, Kill! at the Eat Me, Beat Me Theater (74 Otis Street, Thurs-Sat. 10PM dress casual).

Chris Linnevers, a world renowned unicyclist and ex-felon, has been sought after for his percussive talents by such highly revered artists as David Hasslehoff, Tiny Tim, Sean Cassidy, and Charo.

Jean Vite, né Jon Fast, almost as famous on the beaches of the French Riviera as he is in the back of a Buick Riviera, is proud to appear in a play at the GCT. Recently he portrayed a toe in My Left Foot, and the Devil in a mime production of The Devil and Miss Jones. He blows you all kisses for coming.

Trung Lai is one bad motherfucker.

Shane Kitchen lives the life he loves, and loves the life he lives. Most well-known for his long-running review, "Skirt Off, Pants On!" showing almost nightly at the Kezar Club (770 Stanyan), he would like to dedicate his performance to all the ladies in the house.

Richard J. Wheyland has been struggling to avoid type-casting since his part as Dr. Dirk Nitrous, the buff, silicone-enhanced beach-dentist on Baywatch. He can be seen slingin' his guitar around town with the noted local grouch band, Spindle.

The Grand Central Theatre Thanks:

The inhabitants of 150 Central and particularly Andrew Crocker, Rory and Michelle, Jim, the generous support of the Owlwood Farm Endowment for the Arts, Kathryn's intuition, the Beastie Boys, Tiffanie Golde for the scripts, Theresa Engle, The Marley Mart, Holey Bagel, The Four Leaf Clover (3346 Mission- come on down!), The Kezar Club, Henry Weinhardt, the Northern California wine industry, Nova Design, Linda High and David Murphy, Holly for the columns, the Balclutha, the Thayer, the Chieftain, my mom, your momma, mothers everywhere, Wayne Kitchen for moving back to San Francisco, Libby for staying in California, synchronicity, adventerous endevourers, couches across the city, viewers like you, the Simpson Family of Springfield, Edwin, the letter "E," flavored coffee (There's no reasonable facsilime), unflavored coffee, Carter-Wallace Incorporated, the unlimited supply of creative excuses, 4:20, the whole cast's immpeccable sense of timing, 4:20, Jenn's grey hair, Tony's headache, the cast proctologist, Dr. Seuss, that cat in the back (Kitty/Aristophanes), that connubial backyard couch, that god detested blot, that foul-lunged son of an ulcer Trung, and Kirsten's baby Blue.

Following the performance, all good citizens are encouraged to join us in a Bacchanalia of the vine, dancing and wild sex.

Back to Tony's theater page